How to Make Millions, by Sarah Palin


Finally there is something everyone in this country can agree on. Sarah Palin knows how to make money. That she is being kicked off college campus’s in the United States and Canada for her chicanery is irrelevant to the organizers of the Get Involved Business Seminar coming to Salt Lake City’s Energy Solution’s Arena on June 9, 2010. Say what you will about  the ex Governor of Alaska, Sarah Palin is capitalizing on anti-government sentiment and in the process making a ton of money. Creative capitalism at its best.

Of course, like so many people who have access to money and power, in time they become as corrupt as the people they assail as being corrupt. Ms. Palin is no exception, in fact she is the archetypical example of how one goes about selling snake oil to the unsuspecting masses.

So much ink and broadband have been wasted on attacking or supporting Ms. Palin that one would think she was a part of the stimulus package. Yet here we are again, me writing and you reading about a person who should have been dismissed years ago by any sentient human being as someone who could be trusted with the nuclear codes, had she been elected vice president.

Take for instance the revelation that one of the biggest buyer of her book, “Going Rouge”, is her own Political Action Committee or PAC. Some 60 thousand dollars of other people’s money was spent on buying up her book  and sending it out to more “believers” in the hope of attracting even more money. Not only does it sound like the proverbial pyramid scheme it has become a powerpoint presentation for unsuspecting dupes who did not make their fortune with  Amway, over-inflated real estate or the stock market.

I am fond of telling my singer/songwriter friends that you can not make this stuff up. And sure enough, in Wednesday’s Salt Lake Tribune, we found a full page ad announcing, that for only $4.95 per person (or the entire office for $19), one could spend the day listening to the advice of everyone from Gen. Colin Powell to the darling of the Tea Party. What a deal.

For those of you who are still with me let me dissemble their message.

Our special guest lecturer will tell you, “How to Overcome Obstacles with Creative Solutions.” Wow. How easy is this one? Instead of actually knowing something about foreign policy, government  and history or reading books and newspapers you can adopt and exploit popular discontent with government and make $. All it takes is sexism,  a folksy down to earth approach, nipple zippers and lipstick. Brilliant. I don’t have to actually work for a living. I can make money on my fellow man/woman’s greed, ignorance and naivete.

Another easy one is, “How to Have Grace Under Fire, “ or in other words how to keep a straight face when the like’s of Kathy Couric and Tina Fey are making you look like a fool. Here too, I would have to agree, the woman is brilliant.

Finally this jewel: “ How to Successfully Manage and Balance Your Personal and Professional Priorities.” It’s easy. Quit your day job, insist that you and your entourage fly first class, lavish your cronies with jobs and opulent life styles, get people to donate to your PAC, charge $100,000 per appearance at Tea Party Rallies and laugh your way to the bank. How could making millions be any easier? Of course you too will have to suspend any ethical quandaries you might find yourself in.

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About marquisdevauban

Disabled Vietnam Era Veteran, Molecular Biologist, Political Activist, Musician, Writer, Philosopher, Outdoorsman, Husband, Father, Son of a
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